Study of Texting While Driving Proves that Studies are Worthy of Further Study

“The first study of drivers texting inside their vehicles shows that the risk sharply exceeds previous estimates based on laboratory research -- and far surpasses the dangers of other driving distractions. The new study, which entailed outfitting the cabs of long-haul trucks with video cameras over 18 months, found that when the drivers texted, their collision risk was 23 times greater than when not texting.” So writes MATT RICHTEL in the New York Times.

Really? REALLY?????
Okay, this goes to show (Please see below posting for further comments on STUPID STUDIES) that you can get people to pay for studies on ANY ASSININE SUBJECT WHATSOEVER. There was a STUDY required to prove that texting was dangerous while driving. By the Virginia Tech Transportation Institute, no less.

Okay, let’s think about this for just a moment. What is “texting” exactly? Well, according to a way-down-the-list definition from the interweb, “texting” is:

“To communicate by text message: He texted that he would be late.”

Texting is the act of typing a message onto a miniscule keyboard which requires looking at said keyboard and printout screen and using peripheral vision ONLY for anything not associated with said miniscule keyboard and printout screen.

Huh. Okay, so what is this “peripheral vision” that I speak of?

According to the interweb, peripheral vision is “the capacity to see side or fringe areas when one is looking ahead; one’s vision using only the outer edges of one’s retina”

Yeah. It really needs a fucking study to prove that using only the outer edges of one’s retina as a vision tool while driving because it is soooooo important to let your BFF know that OMG, you’re like SFL and ROTFLMAO did you see the dress that FG was wearingggggg?????

Fuck you, Virginia Tech Transportation Institute.

Have a nice day.