When Lives Collide with Sharp Objects

Life is always in session. No matter what one might do to try to control that concept, that is simply the way it is. Those Zen types that gave in to this concept long ago and who live stress free, miraculously zit and wrinkle free, with a “half-full” attitude at all times – have a little handle on that little factoid. Life is always in session. But there is always the potential for a curve ball to completely change the course of your game (oh wait – I’m switching metaphors mid paragraph…shit….oh well) causing one to have to reconfigure their comfortable lives. Hurricane, flood, firestorm, earthquake . . . family.

I have a sister. She and I actually haven’t spoken to each other in three years due to one hell of a falling out. It has been a lifetime of getting along, not getting along, being roommates as adults, not being roommates, writing a one-act play together that actually got produced and then reviewed mighty nicely; times we’ve been fiercely dependent upon one another – and times we wanted nothing to do with each other. The last three years has been the worst example of the latter. But “Cancer trumps everything,” as she said to me last night when we spoke for the first time after the long big chill. She has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and will be undergoing surgery next week. They actually caught it early by accident – there are usually no symptoms, so it is usually too late by the time they detect it. She was undergoing a surgical procedure for something else and during the testing prior to the procedure, they found it, did a biopsy, and Voila. Or Tah Dah. Or Motherfuck.

She lives in St. Louis, Missouri and thankfully her medical plan has her at Washington University Medical – which is apparently where one wants to be if they happen to find out they have the worst form of cancer. She’s young to be having it – just what you want to be at a university medical institution – an interesting case . . . and we all have really no idea what to do except show up in St. Louis and take it day by day.

So . . .I’m withdrawing from school for this semester, kissing Manpants and the doggies who will stay home to run things here that have to be run – like the pesky notion of working and paying bills - and will be meeting up with my parents (who are getting to be older and neither of whom are taking this news very well), flying to St. Louis next week for an indeterminate period of time while she has surgery and recuperates. After that, we’ll simply have to try to be like the Zen people and take things as they come and plan for the day to day after that.

I have no idea what tone, subject, rants, blatherings that my blogs will take on – I will more than likely have a lot of time to write them - and I'll need to . . . I understand that St. Louis is a red state and that fine dining consists of something containing a burger . . . I have an inkling that I won’t be going out much except to the hospital or to the store. Sharing with my parents and/or my sister whatever fears, angers, whatevers I have during those empty spaces between being busy will more than likely not be appropriate. Thank goodness for blogging.

Manpants has been an incredible, understanding and selfless rock through all this and I wish everyone could have someone in their lives like that – he makes the room better just by being in it.

Until later. And if you’re the praying sort, put one out there for that sister o’mine. She’ll need it.