Monday, August 30, 2004

Pencil Boxes and People Watching

So, this 40 something student went back to school today for the beginning of the Fall semester. Since I normally attend classes at night after working during the day - the grim reality of an extraordinarily crowded campus during the daytime was something I was not quite prepared for. I was equally unprepared for the number of very young and inexperienced drivers trying to navigate their way through the parking structures in maneuvers too dangerous to speak of, but all accompanied by the "L.A. Wave" after said dangerous maneuver (that's the universal sign for "I'm an Idiot, Thank You!") Upon finally parking the car and rushing across campus to my 8:00 a.m. class (I'm learning to Think Critically) I became rather alarmed at how unaware I have been to the monumental impact that Paris Hilton has had on the fashion sense of the young ladies of normal, not yet perimenopausal, college age. By that I refer to the inexplicable choice of applying an over-the-top amount of spray-applied Mystic Tan to accompany long brassy blond over-bleached hair, blue contact lenses and super-duper low rise pants that barely start covering where the lips of the vulva stop. All-righty then! Then of course there are the others who still insist on wearing UGG boots with mini-skirts, which in my opinion should NEVER be worn together after age 5. Do you find my complete judgment of the current trend toward the trashy somewhat catty and harsh? Deal. It's my blog and I'll be uptight if I want to. Uptight with taste. And don't begin to think the young lads I'll be leering at over the next 18 weeks are immune to my fashion whip. I would like to draw your attention to the still present wearing of the extremely baggy pants pulled half-way down the ass, thereby exposing the boxers or briefs beneath. Now to the young wannabe urban lads that see the gangsta rappers do this - I wonder to myself - do even the gangsta rappers know anymore what they are advertising? Basically, if memory serves, it's called "Jailin" and the baggy look is an homage to when you're in prison and they don't give you a belt. Your pants kind of fall down a tad... Memories....light the corners of my mind.....okay, back on track. So, the deal is, when you wish to let some large and protective hunk of a man know that you are AVAILABLE - you make sure the pants are pulled down to expose a good amount of underwear. If you want to know that you are a really grateful and submissive person, you pull them down so that they ride just under the butt - pretty much exposing LOTS of the underwear. So.....prison memories aside - it just looks pretty stupid for some kid to be walking around like that. Not even Leer Worthy.

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